by Sue Burkhard

Today we I ran out of TIME.

February 18, 2001 I was given the most precious gift. A temperamental, bossy, barky, spunky old goat named Brittany. Ms. Britty, NGA name No Prisoners, came to me from Kelly Graham in Ohio, 3 months after losing my 12 yr. old Thumper to osteosarcoma. I wasn't sure if I was ready to love another. But I did know I had a huge hole in my heart that needed to be filled. I was still very angry and frustrated at having had no TIME to come to grips with Thumper's disease before I was forced to say goodbye. More TIME became my deepest desire. TIME became a major focus in my life. And little did I know then, but 4 months later I would lose my other 12 yr. old greyhound, Niki, with no warning. I came home one day and she was dead. No good-byes, no adjustment period, no more TIME. And suddenly TIME became
much more then a number on a clock, or a mark on a calendar.

Britty taught me that TIME was all those little moments that aren't really noteworthy in and of themselves but put together, are the strands of life that hold it all together. That little romping, jumping, prancy thing which never failed to bring a smile to my face. The "LOOK" that she had that always made me give in and give her whatever she wanted. The sound of her barking at nothing and watching her play with her best buddy, a German Shepherd twice her size. The stumbles that made me catch my breath and acknowledge deep in my soul how much I cared. They were all moments of TIME that could have been easily overlooked. But became the most precious gifts I could have received. For in each moment I was able to feel alive and happy to be, just for that moment, a part of TIME.

All of my dogs have been "teachers". Each one has taught me a special lesson in my life. Jaime, my first German Shepherd taught me tolerance and the meaning of unconditional love. Diesel taught me how to live again and cope with grief. Zackary taught me to think of another living being before I thought of myself, and sometimes doing the right thing means considering someone else's needs over your own. Thumper taught me to see past the surface and trust my emotions, and Niki taught me that the loved ones in our lives we take most for granted can be gone in a minute. But I believe that Britty has taught me the most important lesson to date. She taught me about TIME.

All our lives we ask for more TIME. More TIME to get things done, more TIME to accomplish our goals, more TIME to spend with those we love, and more TIME to live. But while we are asking for all this TIME, we forget to acknowledge the TIME that is happening right in front of us. We are forgetting to be thankful for the accomplishments and goals we do achieve, and we fail to acknowledge how much we love those in our lives until it's almost to late. We spend so much TIME looking back and regretting, blaming, or being angry about things we cannot change anymore and looking forward into the future, trying to mold and create dreams that are often out of our reach, that we spend no TIME enjoying the simple, happy moments that happen every day, a hundred TIMES a day if we would just stop and take a look around.

That is the lesson that Britty taught me. Two and a half years ago I asked for more TIME and didn't get it. I begged and bartered and pled for a couple more days because I had carelessly wasted the days that I had been given. When I didn't get those days I felt cheated and angry. But I cheated myself out of that TIME, and my anger should have been directed inward. When Ms. Britty came to me, frail and wobbly, many friends and family thought I was crazy for taking in an old dog who obviously had a limited lifespan. But I was determined to appreciate the TIME, no matter how long or short it was. And in the course of loving Britty, I learned all about how precious TIME really is.

I always knew that someday her TIME would run out. I wasn't sure when and I didn't know how, but I knew it would be sooner rather then later. And today that day came. My silly old goaty girl accomplished all she had to here on earth. She helped me heal, and taught me all she knew about appreciating life's little pleasures. About living and enjoying today. About stopping and smelling the roses, about the joy of playing in the sandbox even when chores await, and about making sure that those three little words so many find hard to say, I love you, get said every day.

And although my heart is broken, my soul has healed. And I hope that I never let Ms. Britty down and forget her lessons of TIME.

Run like the wind, old goaty girl. I will see you again.